Earlier this week we were made aware of a troubling story in a very reputable medical journal regarding the album from The Editorial We, The National Lunchbox Report. The article outlined a clinical trial in which certain psychotropic pharmaceuticals were put head to head with the album. Findings suggest the album out-performed the drugs with fewer unpleasant side effects and an increase in the pleasant ones.
Other studies in the works put The National Lunchbox Report against over-the-counter pain relievers, anti-convulsants, anti-histamines, anti-balding creams, peanut-allergy suppressants, quinine, penicillin, horse pills, bennies and various remedies for discrete gender-related conditions; while it’s too soon to make a conclusive statement in most of those studies, early trials suggest the new album by The Editorial We is more effective and improves blood-flow and stamina.
We respectfully request the medical community cease and desist the use of The National Lunchbox Report to improve the lives of people everywhere through it’s unintended beneficial medical applications. While the music and lyrics it contains have thus far been clinically proven to cure everything, such application is a misuse of its content.
As for the general listening public, we hope that you are able to judge The National Lunchbox Report for its artistic merit and look past the unintended improvement to their health. This album, though in fact technically a panacea, should not be treated as such.
